Just a Little Loopie!

Well I guess to start off I would like to welcome you to my new blog! I created this blog to help friends and family to learn a little about what I am going through in my day to day life! Also in time I will add some information on Lupus and RA. I will try my hardest to blog everyday even if it is a short paragraph on how I was feeling, or just a quick blurb to get something off my chest! The more I write the better family and friends will understand how exactly I feel, and deal with these chronic diseases every day! Please feel free to comment on ANY post! I have nothing to hide, this is who I am! So sit back and read!!



What You Should Know About Me!

My Pain 
My pain is not the same as your pain! I cannot work my pain or shake it off. Its not even a pain that stays put! Today it is my shoulder, but tomorrow it may be my hip or hands. My pain is not well understood, but it is real!

My Fatigue 
I am not merely tired. I am often in a severe state of exhaustion. I may want to participate in physical activities, but I can't. Please do not take this personally. If you saw me shopping in the mall yesterday, but I can't help you with yard work today, it isn't because I don't want to. I am, most likely, paying the price for stressing my muscles beyond their capability

My Forgetfulness 
Those of us who suffer from it call it brain fog. I may not remember your name, but I do remember you. I may not remember what I promised to do for you, even though you told me just seconds ago. My problem has nothing to do with my age, but may be related to sleep deprivation caused by chronic pain. I do not have a selective memory. On some days, I just don't have any short-term memory at all.



My Clumsiness 
If I step on your toes or run into you five times in a crowd, I am not purposely targeting you. I do not have the muscle control for that. If you are behind me on the stairs, please be patient. These days, I take life and stairwells one step at a time.

My Depression 
Yes, there are days when I would rather stay in bed or in the house or die. Severe, unrelenting pain can cause depression. Your sincere concern and understanding can pull me back from the brink. Your snide remarks can tip me over the edge.

My Stress 
My body does not handle stress well. If I have to give up my job, work part time, or handle my responsibilities from home, I'm not lazy. Everyday stresses make my symptoms worse and can incapacitate me completely.

My Weight 
I may be fat or I may be skinny. Either way, it is not by choice. My body is not your body. My ability to control my appetite is broken, and nobody can tell me how to fix it. My med's and chronic disease are in control of my weight!

My Need for Therapy 
If I get a massage every week, don't envy me. My massage is not your massage. Consider how a massage would feel if that charley horse you had in your leg last week was all over your body. Massaging it out was very painful, but it had to be done. My body is knot-filled. If I can stand the pain, regular massage can help, at least temporarily.My good days - If you see me smiling and functioning normally, don't assume I am well. I suffer from a chronic pain and fatigue illness with no cure. I can have my good days, weeks, or even months. In fact, the good days are what keep me going. However, on my bad days why drag everyone down with me? So most of the times I have learned to smile even on the bad days!

My Uniqueness 
Even those who suffer from chronic pain are not alike. That means I may not have all of the problems mentioned above. I do have pain above, below the waist, and on both sides of my body that has lasted for a very long time. I may have migraines, hip pain or shoulder pain, or knee pain, but I do not have exactly the same pain as anyone else. I hope that this helps you understand me, I have shared these thoughts with many "Lupies", as we call our self, and they agree with me. So when you see someone at the store who gets out of the Handi-cap space and they look fine -- Do not judge them as you may Not know their Inner pain.==== And always remember I LOVE YOU! ====